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Thursday, June 23, 2011

love languages

today i realized that food as a gift- to others- is my love language to them.

all the many decades i've been cooking and baking, and done it all out of love...and only today i realized the significance of what i've done.

one of my earliest memories is standing tiptoe in our yellow kitchen, spreading beautiful yellow butter and beautiful yellow mustard on fresh bread to make a sandwich for me and my brother. (this is possibly the source of my love of yellow...)

my mom was not a love-cook. she was a good cook, but to her it was work. she hated buying groceries. one of my happiest times is when i'm in the supermarket, stocking up on delicious things for my family. i often am overly-enthusiastic and have to put items back when i get to the cashier as i'm over budget.

i love cooking.

i particularly love baking.

back in the old days, in canada on the prairies, i'd preserve fruit and make pickles with all the farmers' wives..just like a good pioneer woman.

real pioneer woman, queen of the blog world, has of course been crowned as the reigning majesty of cooking/baking/homeschooling/romance/pretty much everything else...

but in my little world, i am the queen of fresh bread, organic healthy cookies, interesting and experimental recipes (mental?? :)) and general delicious smells wafting out of my (new) kitchen.

it's my love language.

it says, to my loved ones, "i'm here. i'm in the heart of this home, making healthy food for you to eat because i love you and i want you to be healthy and strong. let's all sit down and together enjoy the tastes and smells of home."

and here's hoping my dear older children have forgiven me for the brief foray into the world of soybean cooking back in the 80's!


now i really must go mold my curried meatballs and get the brown rice in the cooker.


Sunday, June 19, 2011


the weeks are just too crazy.

i can't keep up.

just too much going on. pressures...stolen bike...faraway kids issues...sick baby...did i mention financial pressures?...

Lord, it's been one of those weeks.

help me to slow down and just let you be my grace.

help me to see you in every phone call, email, text that bears with it a crisis in some form.

you are here, and you know exactly what needs to happen.

help me to know i can't do it all, nor do i need to do it all.

i can't fix everything. although i would sure like to, and i try.

help, help, help.

may i remember that the ocean will roll
the sand will sparkle
the sun will rise
the evening will fall

and you will still be God of it all.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

when love takes you in...

everything changes.

since our little trio of children has been told that they have a forever family waiting for them, everything has changed.

their eyes are brighter. they are more confident. they are excitedly talking about christmas-time, when they will see their new mom and dad and 'have a house'!

what, i ask, have they been living in the past 6 years???

they've been living in an institution. a homey, caring, loving institution, but they know it's not home.

their hearts have been longing for a house that is just theirs, not 50 other children's as well.

cherrylyn tonight...praying for her new family to not miss her too much...her little heart, of course, is saying, 'help me not to miss them too much'...

when love takes you in, everything changes.

somewhere, someone's waiting, wishing, longing for you too, sweet little girlie. for all of you.

God is the father of the orphan...but how doubly precious when a real live human daddy-and mommy- comes along and takes them in.

everything changes.

Thursday, June 9, 2011

silence and stillness

the past few days have been still and quiet.

only one little girlie around, and she with a fever and snuggled quiet on the couch with books and videos and stuffed toys.

too still.

a visiting old friend, resting up from jet lag, quiet conversations and laughter and napping. so many naps. yawning in the sunshine, sleepy in the rain.

so still.

the rain followed days of scorching sun- pounding rain, quiet rain, lashing rain, dripping rain...days and days of rain. perfect for resting, reading, eating, nursing little girlie.

today, we took a long walk, slowly, among the green fields and the flowers and the light mist. dogs came along but were sent home for being too bouncy and barky.

a long, slow walk. looking at the small quiet things along our pathway, smelling the flowers.

'be still...and know that I am God...'

he said this, purposefully.

how lovely, this brief interval of quiet.

just what my soul needed.